I have been stuck for a while on trying to heal. I have known that it went back to the time when I was an infant, after being born, but before being 2 years old.
When I tried really hard to understand what contracts I made with a particularly strong entity during this time, I was able to discern that the contract had to do with wanting a way out of life. So, I had a pretty big issue buried deeply about whether or not I wanted to even live. And this issue affects me daily, because every negative thing that happens during the day takes me back to when I was an infant and wanted to die.
When I asked my husband for a Priesthood blessing on Sunday to help get of this, I saw in my mind's eye a very strong-willed entity that was inside of me. I was told through the Holy Spirit these words, "It is very strong." So, I have been wrestling with this for a long time. I continued to wrestle throughout the week to try to overcome this demon, and I continued to feel lots of backlash toward God and lots of bitterness come out.
At one point, Heavenly Father appeared in my mind's eye. He said, "Julie, everything I have will be YOURS if you just overcome this last thing. If you can just give this up, everything I have will be yours." I said, "Bull Crap!" amongst other things that won't be mentioned here; and I continued on in my bitterness and anger.
Then, yesterday evening, I went for a walk outside. It had just finished raining. I walked to the corner and right in front of me, was a double rainbow. I felt convicted. I knew that rainbow was from God, and it was right there for me. God was promising if I could overcome these hurts, that I would never be hurt like that again. In fact, in a memory I re-lived a couple years ago, Heavenly Father had taken me out of my body during the trauma and showed me in heaven a double rainbow. He had promised me then and was promising me again now that once I had overcome these strongholds, I would never suffer from them again. The rainbow touched me deeply, and gave me some much needed perspective, but I was not finished yet.
I basically knew what the issue was, but I couldn't face it. I didn't really have a reason to want to live, according to this infant part of me. My strategy so far was to find others to love me, so that I could want to live. The problem, is that this strategy was only working insofar as I got my way. It wouldn't stand if things didn't go perfectly right according to my wishes.
I used some emotion code techniques and intent to clear the trauma and went to bed. I saw that I had several different entities leave that night. By morning, I still felt a little drab, so I knew there was much more work to be done. I worked using emotion code techniques again in the morning, clearing several, if not thousands, of trapped emotions.
At this point, I needed to upgrade my spirit and body, so I laid down for a nap, and when I was falling asleep, I woke up with the question burning deep inside me: Why do I want to live? Should I live because others love me? I decided the answer was no. I decided the answer was, that I want to live because I have courage to try living. The only reason why I want to live my life, is because I have COURAGE!!!!
Then, I went to sleep, and re-lived being an infant. When I re-live something, I am unlocking a portion of my brain where my spirit and body were never connected, hence the entity that occupied that space. Part of letting go of the entity is organizing the trauma in my brain, which requires me to actually live out what I had fled my body from at the time. So basically, I re-live the entire experience that caused the dissociation.
So, I re-lived being spun around in many different ways. I could hear myself making baby noises. They were not bad, they were fine baby noises. The spinning was not torture persay, but it was enough to get me disoriented enough to dissociate. Then, I heard the voice of what an older boy was talking about, and also 2 adult men, I think. The boy was talking about "Phamma Rays" and seemed to be having a scientific discussion.
Then, I had 2 different visuals. One was the visual of some off-white furniture. My next visual was seeing outside the window. As clear as day, were stars. I was absolutely sure in this memory, because I sensed intuitively--some things you just know-- that I was on a ship, in outer space!
This is not my first memory of being in outer space. But, this is certainly my youngest.
I have had another memory where I was looking out a window of a space craft. It was a large window. We were landing on something that could have been the moon. I could see the marshy craters. It looked to me that there was water on it.
There was another memory I relived where I was re-living the take off of the space ship. I re-lived feeling the g-forces pull down on me. During this time, I injured my hand. So, after the ship stabilized, I had to radio down to someone to ask for a band aid. At first the man said "We have a mission to do," as a way of telling me to get over it. Well, I responded, "Do you have telepathy?" And, he went quiet. Then he said, "Ok, there should be a first aid kid [up front around there]."
The rest of my memories come up in dreams and such, so it is harder for me to know what is real and what is just a dream. But when I re-live dissociated memories, which is basically known as a flashback; that is what i trust, because I have the memory fresh as if it had just happened. So I usually rely on those to put together my picture of what happened to me growing up.
I do want to thank many people in my life that have helped me heal from these negative emotions and have worked with me in so many different ways.
If you want a witness to the secret space program, please watch this interview between Kerry Cassidy and M.T. Keshe. In this video, Keshe states that we have 72,000 pedophila rings on the planet. He also explains that man has been traveling to space for a very long time. Keshe is the founder of the Keshe foundation, where he has dedicated his life to releasing plasma technology. He has released a series of blueprints online where you can build your own energy generator with copper wire, gans (salt water and metals), and caustic or heating element to create nano-coated wires. I myself am in the process of creating his blueprint generator.
I have been privileged to speak with Simon Parkes, a respected expert in the field of E.T.s and Government Black Projects, who specializes in healing people with D.I.D. from Satanic Ritual Abuse. I was able to share some information off of my memories of my I.D. clearance cards and he explained that the symbols on my cards were from the Secret Space Program.
Another witness for the Secret Space Program is Dave Hodges. He explains how his Father shared highly classified material with him before he passed away. Among those things disclosed, was the secret space program. He was taught that everything you see in Star Trek has already been invented.
Simonparkes.org Connecting Consciousness
Interview of M.T. Keshe by Kerry Cassidy of Project Camelot, May 23, 2017, start at 1 hour 22 minutes for the pedophila information and Space information