This post may need some updating because I have grasped a concept today that was vital for my healing, but I am not sure how to express it in words.
There are 2 concepts that are critical for one to grasp in order to heal from sexual abuse, and I am sure these can be applied in order to heal from mental illness of any kind, and bring hormones into balance.
The first is that Jesus Christ's spirit is intrinsic within you, His love has always been with you and you have never been out of His sight, love, and care. If any parts of you have felt that this wasn't true, they need to be invited to experience the love of Christ now. This can be done through a simple visualization: see in your mind's eye your spirit as it came from our Heavenly Parents arms into this world. See yourself standing right at the threshold of coming into your body and going through the veil to experience your mortal life. Jesus Christ is going to go with you, His Spirit is intrinsic within you, and He is always going to be with you. See yourself coming down the birth canal, and if there are any parts of you left behind (as this does happen at birth due to trauma at birth), invite them to experience this love of Christ that you feel. You do not have to re-feel any pain, just invite those parts to join with you. Continue throughout your life, as a newborn, 3 month old, 6 month old, etc, until you are at your current age now. As you go through your life, if there are any parts of you that you feel were left behind at certain ages, just go ahead and invite them back. When you get to your current age, open your heart and arms to all of your parts and ask them to join into your soul with you and tell them you are sorry if they ever felt unwanted. Picture them coming back into your body to be with you. Then imagine a figure 8 going around you 3 to 10 times, as much as you feel you need to, to help you be whole again.
Splitting parts of your spirit from your body happens during sexual abuse because it is to traumatic for your spirit to be raped, and so lots of times your spirit just checks out, but you need your spirit in your body for you to be healed and to find a fulness of joy, so keep inviting it back in. This process may or may not bring up repressed memories. This is not important. If your body knows you are ready to handle a repressed memory, then it will bring it up in degrees that you can handle. The deal is, do not force memories to come up, and when you do, trust that you are strong enough to handle it. When you first do this, it will probably feel great, but then you will find that it is not permanent. You will find that at the first sign of bodily stress your spirit checks out and scatters again. Just keep inviting your spirit to be whole within your body. When your spirit keeps checking out of your body, it causes unbalanced hormones and mental illnesses such as bi-polar. Be patient with yourself and just practice, I like to tap on my neck and chest sometimes while I invite my spirit to be grounded within me, and that helps speed the process.
If you have invited your spirit back within you, and you are doing great, do not be surprised if your good feelings quickly spiral down hill. When your spirit checks out, devils sometimes get in. But do not be afraid. Realize that your hatred for God and your hatred and anger is coming from those devils. Raise your arm to a square and say, "In the name of Jesus Christ my Master I command you to depart." Do it as much as necessary and drink lots of water. Get a good nights sleep and you will feel so much better in the morning. Forgive yourself for any feelings of anger you have toward God and realize that they fundamentally do not come from you. An occasional fast can also help cleanse you spiritually.
The second key to healing is to understand sex and its purpose in God's plan. You must know why sex out of wedlock is contrary to the plan of happiness. One of the main reasons we came to earth and went through the veil was so we could obtain a body. Our bodies are made out of the elements. The elements have no spiritual understanding when we come into them. It is our purpose on earth to bring our bodies into perfection along with our spirits. Our bodies become our servants, to teach our spirits how to experience a fullness of joy. If I reach my hand out to grasp your hand, my body sends sensations to my brain and my spirit picks up on it (for lack of better words). Now, my spirit knows what it feels like to experience touch as an element. Now my spirit can have a fullness of joy in the shaking of hands. If I learned to shake someone's hand and felt the joy of it, after I die my spirit will still be able to shake your hand and feel it, because my body of flesh gave my spirit the framework in order to understand what a handshake feels like.
One night, an angel came and took me from my body. I was allowed to lay on the grass, and pet some dogs, and enjoy touch. I was able to feel with my spirit just like I had a body, and I realized it was my body that had taught my spirit how to enjoy touch even though I didn't have my body at that moment.
The more perfect the bond between our spirit and body, the more sure that joy is. We hope to some day have resurrected bodies, where spirit and flesh are inseparably connected, in which the joy of element coupled with the quickening of spirit brings joy beyond comprehension. Doctrine and Covenants 93:33 states, "For man is spirit. The elements are eternal, and spirit and element, inseparably connected, receive a fulness of joy".
Doctrine and Covenants 129 verses 4-8 testify of this principle and how it can be used in discerning spirits:
4. When a messenger comes saying he has a message from God, offer him your hand and request him to shake hands with you.
5. If he be an angel he will do so, and you will feel his hand.
8. If it be the devil as an angel of light, when you ask him to shake hands he will offer you his hand, and you will not feel anything; you may therefore detect him.
The devil's spirit cannot communicate physically with you, because he has not had a body, and his spirit cannot understand the framework of element contacting element. This may not be exactly right, but it is how I understand it for now.
Now, lets talk about sex: when you partake of sex, your spirit is inundated with an amazing experience of joy. Wether in or out of wedlock, your spirit is going to learn that sex is amazing. The problem with it being out of wedlock, is it interferes with your spirit's ability to love God and other people in a non-sexual way. This is because the amazing feeling of sex is associated with the amazing feeling of love. When you find yourself in love with another person, you will feel like you need to have sex with them because you are not grounded.
Sex is supposed to be a physical interaction between 2 married people. When 2 married people experience it, they feel love and joy, and it is grounded in marriage. Meaning, it is a starting place that all your love for others will come from. It took me 6 years to overcome this principle. In my puberty years, every time I associated with a boy or man, I felt a sexual pull toward them. It was difficult to separate brotherly love from sex.
If you love someone, you may feel like you need to have sex with them. If you see someone attractive, you may feel like you need to have sex with them. This is the will of the flesh. The carnal mind has always been an enemy to God. (Romans 8:7).
The truth is, we have been commanded to love all men and God, and we have been commanded to only have sex within marriage. As we exercise self control to keep sex within marriage, our love between marriage partners grows, and our love for our children, family, and all people closely follows behind.
If you have sex out of wedlock it is like having an electric circuit and not grounding it. Anybody who comes by is going to get killed from electric shock. Ungrounded sex makes it impossible to love yourself or anybody else. But grounded sex is like plugging into an outlet where God's power flows to you and to all around you. It is the perfect environment for having children.
So, you have had sex out of wedlock. What to do? You need to be grounded, which means, unhook your sex desire and your love. Sex is needed for our bodies in order to relax and balance our hormones. It is not needed in order to fully express love toward someone. The media would have you believe that as soon as you see someone attractive you need to have sex with them in order to fully experience loving that person, but this is not true. We have been commanded to love each other and God. Our ability to love others and God can grow stronger and more powerful as it draws nourishment from the roots of the tree of marriage and sex within the covenant. Sex within marriage gives your spirit the framework to draw from in order to grow love for God and all people.
I believe it is very essential to move any energy that has not been grounded into the grounded and bountiful zones of wedlock. If you were a child, you need to imagine all of that sexual activity occurring within the bounds of marriage with your spouse and unhook that unhealthy soul tie with your abuser/accomplice. Imagine and redefine that sexual activity as happening within your own marriage, and then you will have a proper physical boundary to love all of God's children with a healthy spiritual love. This brings a fullness of joy. It is necessary to take any unhealthy sexual activity in the past out and re-write your past.
If you are not married yet, then consider yourself widowed, and wait for a future marriage that you can use to redefine your past sexual experiences in a proper way. And the day will come when the Lord fulfills His promise to you as stated in Isaiah 54:4:
4 Fear not; for thou shalt not be ashamed: neither be thou confounded; for thou shalt not be put to shame: for thou shalt forget the shame of thy youth, and shalt not remember the reproach of thy widowhood any more.
The boundaries of marriage allow the roots of God's love to grow deep, allowing you to reach and reach out to shower love to all God's children. If you have any roots sticking out of your marriage, work to stick it back in.
It is alright to fully and truly love members of the opposite sex, but it is not okay to love them sexually. You must break this connection and love all people the way Jesus Christ loves us.
Julie T. Bucker
Is love stronger? Stronger than all other things? Whose side will you choose to be on?
Satanic Ritual Abuse